Airport Security Part II: Anticipation is Making Me Wait
Over the last three years, I have probably had to go through an airport security screening line on average of once per business day. I've seen *many* things.
While its popular to attack airport screening, and I suppose it's apropos considering some of the lameness we've seen from the TSA, I'd like to take a turn at defending it...a bit.
I've read articles about people who have had all kinds of problems. Most of them involve the elderly, the young or the handicapped. I'm not making a judgment call, I'm just relating what *I've* seen and how I feel it probably extends to the world beyond me.
My first observation is that the bulk of issues I see at the screening points surround people not being aware of the rules. Let's pick one simple rule that, from my experience, makes up way over half of the "issues" at the TSA checkpoints: liquids.
Now, take a walk with me. We're going to start at the ticket counter at Denver International Airport, and swing around a corner, then another corner and hop on the moving walkway towards Terminal A security checkpoint. At least one time during that walk, the PA system *will* play a notification about restrictions on liquids. Now, halfway down the hall, you are forced to leave the moving walkway. There is a table here, and a large poster board telling you about liquid restrictions. There's also a box of plastic baggies to put your less-than-3-oz-liquids into with full instructions. You may not notice it, of course, because you are distracted by the television which has a looped video (with the volume at about "8") telling you about the restrictions. Somehow you make it past this point still ignorant (and sucking down your "Dasani") and you make it to the checkpoint where there are no less than three signs telling you of liquid restrictions.
And yet, you would not believe how many people B&M when they find out they cannot bring their water bottle through. "I just bought this!"
During Spring Break this year, I saw a family go through and the father saw one of the signs and he threw away his drink. Good dog. Then, when his family of 5 went through, the TSA people pulled out a dozen water bottles from their bags! "You've *got* to be kidding," he says. "When did this come about?"
"Way before you read the sign and threw yours away," I replied. He gave me a sheepish look, because he and I knew that he knew and still chose to "test" the TSA. Fine, but don't bitch about it when you get caught.
Okay, no big deal. What about the horror stories I've witnessed? A young child (3 years old or so) ripped out of his grandmother's arms and forced through the security gate without her! Well, I'm sure that's how granny tells it. The TSA made reasonable requests (you may carry her, or you must send her through separately) and she had a hissy fit. "I'm too old to carry her! Blah blah blah She can't walk through by herself!" So much so that I looked up and noticed police and other TSA people calmly make their way over to the area where the ruckus originated (and continued for quite some time.)
The child? She walked through, turned around and looked at "freaky old grandma" having a fit like a big girl.
I've seen people in wheelchairs ask if they can stand up, and I've seen them (or their proxy) respond "No, she has just had hip surgery" or something to that effect, and the TSA person moves to Plan B. No problem, right?
Following one of these families past the checkpoint, the conversation was something like "I can't believe they even asked you to stand up" and by the time we made it to the concourse the male in the group (the wheelchair-bound lady's son-in-law, I believe) was relating on the phone how "they were trying to make her stand up!"
One blogger commented that some airports require shoes to be removed, others do not, and then bemoans the lack of consistency as a problem.
I'll tell you what; take of your frigging shoes, toss any liquids over 3oz into the trash, put others in a 1qt baggy, take off your metal (watches, belts, etc) and leave the knives and scissors at home.
Reeeeeallly. This isn't difficult. The TSA can't say it, because it's not politically correct, but I'll say it: I've yet to see an issue in the security line that wasn't caused by a moron, and that moron has yet to be wearing a TSA uniform.
While its popular to attack airport screening, and I suppose it's apropos considering some of the lameness we've seen from the TSA, I'd like to take a turn at defending it...a bit.
I've read articles about people who have had all kinds of problems. Most of them involve the elderly, the young or the handicapped. I'm not making a judgment call, I'm just relating what *I've* seen and how I feel it probably extends to the world beyond me.
My first observation is that the bulk of issues I see at the screening points surround people not being aware of the rules. Let's pick one simple rule that, from my experience, makes up way over half of the "issues" at the TSA checkpoints: liquids.
Now, take a walk with me. We're going to start at the ticket counter at Denver International Airport, and swing around a corner, then another corner and hop on the moving walkway towards Terminal A security checkpoint. At least one time during that walk, the PA system *will* play a notification about restrictions on liquids. Now, halfway down the hall, you are forced to leave the moving walkway. There is a table here, and a large poster board telling you about liquid restrictions. There's also a box of plastic baggies to put your less-than-3-oz-liquids into with full instructions. You may not notice it, of course, because you are distracted by the television which has a looped video (with the volume at about "8") telling you about the restrictions. Somehow you make it past this point still ignorant (and sucking down your "Dasani") and you make it to the checkpoint where there are no less than three signs telling you of liquid restrictions.
And yet, you would not believe how many people B&M when they find out they cannot bring their water bottle through. "I just bought this!"
During Spring Break this year, I saw a family go through and the father saw one of the signs and he threw away his drink. Good dog. Then, when his family of 5 went through, the TSA people pulled out a dozen water bottles from their bags! "You've *got* to be kidding," he says. "When did this come about?"
"Way before you read the sign and threw yours away," I replied. He gave me a sheepish look, because he and I knew that he knew and still chose to "test" the TSA. Fine, but don't bitch about it when you get caught.
Okay, no big deal. What about the horror stories I've witnessed? A young child (3 years old or so) ripped out of his grandmother's arms and forced through the security gate without her! Well, I'm sure that's how granny tells it. The TSA made reasonable requests (you may carry her, or you must send her through separately) and she had a hissy fit. "I'm too old to carry her! Blah blah blah She can't walk through by herself!" So much so that I looked up and noticed police and other TSA people calmly make their way over to the area where the ruckus originated (and continued for quite some time.)
The child? She walked through, turned around and looked at "freaky old grandma" having a fit like a big girl.
I've seen people in wheelchairs ask if they can stand up, and I've seen them (or their proxy) respond "No, she has just had hip surgery" or something to that effect, and the TSA person moves to Plan B. No problem, right?
Following one of these families past the checkpoint, the conversation was something like "I can't believe they even asked you to stand up" and by the time we made it to the concourse the male in the group (the wheelchair-bound lady's son-in-law, I believe) was relating on the phone how "they were trying to make her stand up!"
One blogger commented that some airports require shoes to be removed, others do not, and then bemoans the lack of consistency as a problem.
I'll tell you what; take of your frigging shoes, toss any liquids over 3oz into the trash, put others in a 1qt baggy, take off your metal (watches, belts, etc) and leave the knives and scissors at home.
Reeeeeallly. This isn't difficult. The TSA can't say it, because it's not politically correct, but I'll say it: I've yet to see an issue in the security line that wasn't caused by a moron, and that moron has yet to be wearing a TSA uniform.
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